I like it. Barfy the gin-flavoured Assman
you probably should not have drank the wine that everyone spits out. and the sad part, that was not even your low point last night
I knew she could be a good mother by the way she craddled three 40oz's.
Gotta love hanging with Nat. By the time guys realize she isnt going home with them, they've spent enough money and time to think I'm a good idea.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm starting to blur the boundary between reasonable senioritis and self-destruction. Somewhat-openly hittin the flask in 11am class
Almost propositioned sex in exchange for a study guide for my final tomorrow.
By the third Id pass back i figured the bouncer had fucked one of us.
I woke up and he was starring at me and then said "do you believe in miracles"?
Bro... You handed me an ice cube from your drink and said "tell me if it tastes like pickles".
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Most people would probably take his lack of responses as a queue to stop. But nope, not me. I just keep going. And that's why I don't have a bf, just a little weinered friend
I told him i turn boys gay hoping that would scare him off. Finally i found a way to take advantage of my disability.
I'll bring your "congrats on finally banging" cookies tomorrow, I'm exhausted.
I just had to explain to my grandma what a reach-around is. Too far..
While we were doing it he looked up at me and said "Does your husband fuck you this good?" Talk about a mood killer....
i just remembered i drunk watched the brave little toaster last night
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