He could be your dad!
We discussed that right before he asked for my number
Pregaming class all semester has made this final review session more like my introduction to the topic.
Why not. Its my b-day, you're in town, I'm in town, bars are in town, and alcohol is in town. I don't see anything not good about those things.
Your brother came in a girls mouth for the first time last night... Ah the tales told whilst buying minors beer.
Is it bad to have a craving for speed? I feel like my nose is thirsty.
There's green glitter on my nipple rings. #mardigras2013
Typing up notes at the bar and doing shots with the bartender until close on a Wednesday. This is what my second year of law school has become.
Any recommendations for how to tell your wife about the pics of her 19 yr old sister on a porn site without admitting you were surfing said porn site?
I got custody of our girlfriend in the breakup.
we watched a porno and made a drinking game out of it. best first date ever.
Well start with a list of things you don't want to do... Like maybe 1) I don't want join Isis. That's a good start.
I found a hot kiwi last time and sucked his dick. That's what rooftop bars are made for.
I wasn't that gone.
Dude, you cried and said how sorry you were when we asked why you had the dip.
Im sober enough to understand what people are saying but drunk enough to understand its hilarious
I’m never getting home or fucked or eating hot Taco Bell fml
Randomize
