I just spent twenty minutes with brandons dad explaining why head isnt typically considered sex...can we say awkward?
i told him he had the best dick i've ever seen. then supposedly i kept repeating "peter piper picked the perfect penis"
I love watching others lives come down to our level.
drunk sex in a shower = bad idea broken arm
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i don't think it's normal to still be missing spring break.
If we don't get kicked out of this hotel tonight for fucking too loud we're breaking up
will barter weed for kareoke machine...
this is why ugly people need low self esteem. it stops them from doing shit like this.
And by defning the relationship I mean telling him I'm gonna fuck other people but its cool If he does the same.
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The best part of that night wasn't even the sex, it was listening to her explain to her boyfriend why she was naked in her room while I hid in her closet.
I want to own their dicks and all the attachments
And then after we fucked he wouldn't stop calling me "champ". It was like I had sex with an extremely attractive soccer coach
Today is National Blunt Day in the Great State of Me. Come ovah
I'm definitely closer to having sex in every building on campus than I am to having a post-graduation career/plan/future. Unless that future is getting fucked in lots of buildings. I got that shit on lock down.
He was like the most intimidating looking guy you've seen in your life except he was really shittily doing the two step