its amazing how hard it is to tell vomit from stuffing the day after
Do fat girls normaly have fat that look like a penis by their pussy?
What the hell did you do last night?!
you should be back in the room by now but just so you know. you passed out at the black jack table and they wheel chaired you out. strip club in about 45 minutes. game face bro.
I'm on my way, but at some point we're going to have to settle who gave who crabs the last time
So yeah she lost her virginity in a wheel chair with a broken pelvis. I'm still trying to figure out how I should feel about that.
I'm making myself a nametag with my contact info and pinning it to myself like a kindergardenter in case I get lost when I black out on Sat.
Can we laminate it? Just to be safe.
Trevor is horny so he just called me to tell me all the things that he would like to do with his future wife. That's a new one.
Whoever labeled dysfunctional a bad thing obviously never saw this frinedship coming.
Why would I take you home? That would eliminate the chances of you making bad decisions I could ridicule you about later.
Please tell me you're not playing strip poker with your cousins again
I was going to text you that earlier, but I felt like before 10 was probably to early to bring up boners
I'm not coming to work today because tequila
This hangover is too legit right now. I just sneezed and almost puked
I haven't answered because I haven't figured out a polite way of saying fuck no
I'm not big on drama but you need to put your pants on and leave.
Randomize
