you still trying to smash that chick?
it's a losing battle and she kinda sucks. been busy with school so not getting midweek drunk - she's nearly unbearable sober
Bc you can definitely buy condoms if ur a 14 year old girl
mustard is like jesus in yellow tights
I want to take things slow emotionally, but fast physically
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
and on the seventh day, God created megan fox
there's a booger on my laptop, i suspect it's yours
Her dad smelled like someone lit a fart and burned their ass hairs.
Dude, just paid my sister in vicodin to go out and buy me a slushie.
Dude, I just cut my asshole on the new toilet paper. If you rationed the grocery money to buy drugs, I better be getting some.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Nice. Don't spend your therapist's co-pay on Jaeger bombs.
I threw all my money on the ground and said it was for homeless people and fell down the stairs
My radar detector detects ice cream trucks. I think it was made for stoners
Just got your message from Saturday. Shove all the kittens down your pants? Really?
I was emotionally compromised.
Seriously bro? Indoor roman candle wars? I guess I'll never see that fucking security deposit again
Trust me, I'm a professional lesbian.
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