Texts From Last Night

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  (775): View more from Nevada

  What do you call a girl with PMS and GPS?

  (1-775): View more from Nevada

  A crazy bitch that WILL find your ass!

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  (775): What do you call a girl with PMS and GPS? (1-775): A crazy bitch that WILL find your ass! http://tfl.nu/lvgp
  Replies (16) Good night (1541) Bad night (2323) Order T-Shirt
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  (518): View more from New York

  What do you want? Don't say anything that would make me look like a pussy at the store.

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  (518): What do you want? Don't say anything that would make me look like a pussy at the store. http://tfl.nu/xk1d
  Replies (2) Good night (2235) Bad night (513) Order T-Shirt
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  (601): View more from Mississippi

  hey dude i know youre in the next room but me and your sister need a condom, got any i could borrow?

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  (601): hey dude i know youre in the next room but me and your sister need a condom, got any i could borrow? http://tfl.nu/vvua
  Replies (124) Good night (6206) Bad night (2225) Order T-Shirt
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  (860): View more from Connecticut

  im so poor im using the bottom of my laptop to heat my food.

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  (860): im so poor im using the bottom of my laptop to heat my food. http://tfl.nu/gjjv
  Replies (29) Good night (1085) Bad night (5208) Order T-Shirt
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  (778): View more from British Columbia

  Are you pissed because you didn't get action, or the fact i got boned twice in public places tonight?

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  (778): Are you pissed because you didn't get action, or the fact i got boned twice in public places tonight? http://tfl.nu/8s8e
  Replies (7) Good night (4097) Bad night (763) Order T-Shirt
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  (732): View more from New Jersey

  I looked at you and you stared at me dead in the eyes then sprayed febreze at your crotch and winked.

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  (732): I looked at you and you stared at me dead in the eyes then sprayed febreze at your crotch and winked. http://tfl.nu/sxfw
  Replies (15) Good night (5910) Bad night (1822) Order T-Shirt
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  (843): View more from South Carolina

  I gave him head while he watched NASCAR. My future flashed before my eyes.

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  (843): I gave him head while he watched NASCAR. My future flashed before my eyes. http://tfl.nu/lhf2
  Replies (27) Good night (1034) Bad night (4026) Order T-Shirt
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  (318): View more from Louisiana

  Hey, I can't find my bed frame. Do you know who took it?

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  (318): Hey, I can't find my bed frame. Do you know who took it? http://tfl.nu/nm01
  Replies (2) Good night (2247) Bad night (845) Order T-Shirt
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  (707): View more from California

  I love you. Thanks for all the blowjobs.

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  (707): I love you. Thanks for all the blowjobs. http://tfl.nu/fbru
  Replies (9) Good night (3506) Bad night (641) Order T-Shirt
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  (607): View more from New York

  Did strip banana grams actually happen last night

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  (607): Did strip banana grams actually happen last night http://tfl.nu/pz66
  Replies (4) Good night (1321) Bad night (739) Order T-Shirt
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  (402): View more from Nebraska

  You know you're at a low point when you're sucking vodka out if your hair.

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  (402): You know you're at a low point when you're sucking vodka out if your hair. http://tfl.nu/auy6
  Replies (2) Good night (387) Bad night (985) Order T-Shirt
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  (303): View more from Colorado

  I'm starting to think you fell asleep on your kitchen floor pantless with salsa spilt around you

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  (303): I'm starting to think you fell asleep on your kitchen floor pantless with salsa spilt around you http://tfl.nu/s8pp
  Replies (11) Good night (682) Bad night (468) Order T-Shirt
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  (937): View more from Ohio

  Tell Taylor to rock on. Tell her she is so beautiful that the sun shines down on her face and shows her beauty. Tell her to live on, like Martin Luther King. He'll never die. He's living his dreams.

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  (937): Tell Taylor to rock on. Tell her she is so beautiful that the sun shines down on her face and shows her beauty. Tell her to live on, like Martin Luther King. He'll never die. He's living his dreams. http://tfl.nu/nyo6
  Replies (10) Good night (972) Bad night (417)
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  (440): View more from Ohio

  The amount of precision it takes to urinate into a 2 liter bottle while hammered is undeniably difficult.

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  (440): The amount of precision it takes to urinate into a 2 liter bottle while hammered is undeniably difficult. http://tfl.nu/70ah
  Replies (5) Good night (461) Bad night (192) Order T-Shirt
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  (915): View more from Texas

  I just shit a hot coal. Pretty sure it's that fireball shot from yesterday.

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  (915): I just shit a hot coal. Pretty sure it's that fireball shot from yesterday. http://tfl.nu/5xu3
  Replies (5) Good night (163) Bad night (437) Order T-Shirt

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