How do 1 in 4 women misread a pregnancy test; how stupid are women?
I'm totally counting that party when he kept putting his hands down my pants as a date.
Singing into hair straightener during spice girls....sooo dangerous
on the list of things id be doing when i was almost 30, waiting for a girl to finish shitting the bed wasn't on there.
23 Proposal Horror Stories You Won’t Believe
I just found a 1/2 inch of mimosa in my shoe.
You should get more absorbent shoes.
he thanks me after handjobs.
you found the perfect man.
I just made Jack Daniels snow cones.
Tonight was the second time that I've pretended like English was my 2nd language to avoid conversation w a creeper.
I come back upstairs and she's leaning over sink full of vomit saying 'oh my god it's the chili'
21 Dirty Secrets From Bachelor/Bachelorette Parties That Have Destroyed Marriages
Hey..um, you dont know me, but I just found your purse in a bush at the end of my street this morning
Okay so my USC tutor just offered to eat me out. I think I'm definitely applying to USC.
I got to see some gay bartender let a girl with daddy issues whip Travis in the balls with his own belt. Totally worth it.
Let's celebrate that I used a condom
Thanks for being the best husband and reassuring my fuck buddy that you're comfortable with my adultery. You da real MVP.
you're like an angel sent from heaven to guide my sex life into greatness
Thats so sweet