all we need is a shotglass and a helicopter.
No stds, not pregs, and lost two pounds. I'd call that a successful two years of grad school.
So just to get a feel for things...how prone are you to male Amish strippers...
Tell me you didn't really piss in the hookah.
i mean, not my actual scene but if someone says "PARTY" ill figure it out
It's like they're playing jeopardy and the category is "things that make women dry."
...there was a woman in the stall next to me in the Walmart bathroom having a massive bowl movement and whispering "I'm sorry" over and over
I'm going back to his house to watch wreck it Ralp.
Hey, Monsters Inc. got me laid. Disney man, who knew it leads to sex.
I've woke up with the same hoodie on backwards, twice this week. I think that's a record
After we got done he told me to hold his penis because it helps him fall asleep
had a nice chat with the older gay fellow who works in the bakery at the new vons about vday...we both feel that it's a day of dashed expectations & concerns that we'll have to be cut out of our spanx
Do you want to get naked and order pizza with me
I came home in someone else's underwear this morning
Atleast you got a souvenir
I promised her before I left that I'd make good choices and then got drunk and fucked my best friend and her boyfriend.
You have such a talent for this
Friendship, or finding weed?
Yes
Randomize
