This is clearly one of those "A hole's a hole" situations
I hate when my naked walk-arounds are interrupted by someone knocking on the door
At lowes after workin outside. Kid behind me says "mommy that man smells like a taco" yes she was talking about me.
the last 2 times weve had drunk sex ive had to get the morning after pill.. he's turning into a real expensive fuck buddy.
idk but i have you stored in my phone as 'guy with beard doing body shots'
Someone asked me why we were having sex on the porch last night. All I remember is him saying he wanted the recruits to see. This has got to stop.
I got pulled into the conversation by "she sleeps with everybody" then "she" involved sleeping with "cocks the size of a viva burrito"
my grandpa is going down the line on this prom picture, and telling me how big everyone's nipples are... he was spot on for me.
I forgot I did whipits. Probably because my brain cells were killed from the whipits
I met his dad. Turns out he was a one nighter from the nurses conference in Vegas. Not sure how to handle this one.
Clearly, you already have. Both of them.
Give me a second. I'm doing my best but I'm drunk so for some reason fitting both my boobs in the pic is just incredibly difficult. They aren't THAT big. I'm just being retarded.
I'm just that drunk tells people I love them or wants to set them on fire. Accept that.
He told me I have nice nipples. You can't just tell someone that and then leave the state!
Tempted to tell the Titos promoters at this bar that they are doing the lords work.
Wait, there's no way I said I would suck his dick. I know drunk Katie.
No, you told him to suck YOUR dick.
See now that sounds like drunk Katie.
Randomize
