Rub youre cunt and tell me you love me.
Your incorrect use of you're doesn't arouse me in the slightest.
Its like everytime i see you, my vagina gets a heartbeat.
Dammit. I drunkenly drank all my milk at 6 AM in a misguided stupor to prevent my roommates from stealing my milk.
Outta milk. Using rum instead for pancake mix. Drunk Thursday is a gooo
Two dudes got up on top of the pianos and danced shirtless. They didnt even get kicked out. I love vegas
Let's have sex soon. Just us!! Its sad that I have to specify.
I feel like we shud celebrate your sisters homecoming by having sex in her room
OMG IM A TIGER AND I LOVE ROARING
So immediately after we finished having sex she started singing, "The Circle of Life", put her clothes on and then just left. I think I'm in love.
This is not 2004 anymore. It's not acceptable to get fingered while watching 'Ferngully' in a basement full of your friends.
Nothing tops off the night like giving emotional and spiritual guidance to a 70 year old transvestite.
I don't care. She's the only girl to make me feel like my face is melting when she blows me.
Just got hit on by a 28-year old, quadraplegic, triple-cancer-survivor redneck. Now updating bucket list to meet newfound standards.
is it sad that a disney movie is making me horny?
Well, we went shopping. He bought me starbucks and ate me out in the change room at target. If that isnt the best post covid first date, I don't know what is
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