So I got hit on by a gay guy. It might have something to do with the fact that I licked his nose.
And why did you do that?
can't make this up: he's writing lyrics for the musical reenactment of how he met her @ an anime convention to perform at their wedding. yes, there'll also be dance routines involved.
An attempt at squeezing a tomato to make a bloody mary just says desperation all over it....
we started pounding beers an hour ago to celebrate our personal snow day tomorrow. vodka shots for u of i's actual decision are on standby.
New York to be Host to America’s Biggest Singles Event
the only good thing about him lasting five minutes was that nobody thinks i had sex with him or that im a slut because we were only in the bathroom for five minutes
I'm using the size of your dick as a guage to see how big something is on Amazon. Any questions?
It's all good. The CSI guy came and I played the theme song while he in was in our place. The cops even laughed.
Honestly I think at this point I purposefully schedule nothing on Sundays anymore so I can spend all day wallowing in my shame.
i'll probably be on drugs forewarning
forewarning i'll probably have done those drugs with you
Kylie Jenner Wasn’t in the Kardashian X-Mas Cards & the Internet is Losing it
If I had a vagina, my apartment would have been the Atlantic
Just don't let me get too drunk. At one point I pulled out my dick and pissed at that party. Like on the wall.
he played intl players anthem 4me and ate a strawberry out of my pussy
The sorting hat of life was not kind to you.....
Listening to sad Lana Del Rey songs together is an integral part of the lesbian bonding process
We had a company shotgunning beers contest in the parking lot today, and I won. God bless America!