I'm watching tv and he's trying to stick a vibrator in my ass
I am far too drunk to be making a tuna melt . There's blood EVERYWHERE.
There was a lot of him and a little penis
i realized i had a pad on before i went to this guys house so i stuck it in his neighbors shrub.
It was going well until he told me about the 7k he made in college to be in a gay porn
You face planted into a car door. And somehow didn't drop your burrito.
if she didnt wantt to be febrezed, she shouldnt have smelled so desperate.
After he finished he proceeded to check my boobs for breast cancer.
Just made a floating bacon boat for the hot tub. This is what America is all about.
you must be at least a level 5 friend to unlock my sexual orientation
Is it completely inappropriate to base my morning after pill purchase on if they sell coffee or not?
I am literally this close to screaming out my window if anyone nearby was down to fuck. I am too damn horny.
She drank my rum. I had sex in her bed and didn't wash the sheets. We're even.
I have easymac and six pack of beer. This night can't get any better.
Justin has passed out on the toilet in a locked stall. Stay tuned for pics.
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