umm..so Dad's wearing a thong, I don't know what to do
put a dollar in it?
i wonder what barack obama's brickbreaker high score is...
you refused to leave the drive-thru at mcdonalds until the cashier took a jello shot
Her brother is deaf.
no wonder she was so good with her hands
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There is a contact in my phone named "Bar Mcntysu." this is why we need a third person to go out with us.
I asked if anyone's pants felt wet on the bottom, like a half hour after mine did. I had just peed my pants i had gotten so high no biggie
He just sent me the contact information about getting the Zebra for graduation...
He specifically said I couldn't post the picture of him passed out naked except for a strategically placed washcloth. Where's the fun in that?
YOU'RE MARRIED. TO OTHER PEOPLE.
I just need some dick and some jimmy johns
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have no idea how but i got a hold of a blue food dye packet. And proceeded to rub it all over my tits. So yeah i'd say its safe to say i'll be known as smurfette for a while
She pulled me up to my feet by my hair. I thought it was you for a second. My drunken angel savior.
You're now part of the minority of friends who haven't seen my boobs.
I got my period on eclipse day. I'm officially in line with the moon.
That was the best shit ever it was like an exorcism for my colon
How much weed can I reasonably smoke now if I have to leave for work in a bit over an hour
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