It wouldn't matter if you are Jesus Christ himself, you are not getting into the bar tonight
Question for you. Are boobs and hands polarly charged, thus causing the inevitable joining of the two. If so are some breasts simply charged backwards
I just got a ticket for shitting on a sand dune.
How do you politely bring up someone's criminal record?
Stay Away From These 29 Online Dating Red Flags
i almost set my kitchen on fire last night. homecoming week is getting the best of me
Handle of 100 proof captain dressed like a pilgrim here we go
It was the classiest, most strategic and inspired vomiting I've ever witnessed. Like a blind mans first sunrise. A priests first prayer. Or a virgins first orgasm.
I feel like a blind man at a water park. Every step has the potential to be either fatal or lead to accidental, but totally enjoyable, sex.
spending my first valentines day single in 3 years blazed and eating heart shaped brownies i bought myself. WHO NEEDS A MAN.
21 Rideshare Drivers Had to Drive These NSFW Passengers
Right now I'm in a club where they are passing out glow in the dark dildos by the dozen. I don't think my life will ever get weirder than it is at this moment.
The band last night was really good
That was definitely karaoke. Guess that answers my follow up question on how drunk you were.
Yeah. Moral of the story: Don't mace yourself. It sucks dick.
third nipple confirmed
I NEED TO TAKE A FUCKING BREAK. MY VAGINA IS SMOKING.
Bruh why you gotta judge
You're awake at 3:30 in the morning RSVPing to a musical, I'm well within my means