We drank from noon till 5 am, there was adderall and nice jews involved it was just crazy
this is amy. the small petlike person from the womens bathroom at the reef.
You should get sea herpes
I mean sea horses
I'm totally counting that party when he kept putting his hands down my pants as a date.
My 54 year old father just sent me a YouTube link on my school email titled "Walrus sucks his own dick" and then wrote in the email "I wish I were a walrus". What the fuck is wrong with my family?
He kept buying me shots of tequila. I decided to just save myself the half hour of toilet hugging and tell him straight up that I intended on sleeping with him. We got Tacos on the way home with all the money we saved.
I decided that I do the same thing when i'm drunk with every guy who has a girlfriend...lecture them on how bad cheating is, then hook up with them. I'm like good cop, bad cop.
You should make it a point to use vocabulary that is competition appropriate around him, like "champion" and "training" and "victory sex"
Remember the 3 things that are off limits? They're fair game if you get here in the next 5 minutes
I've been here for three hours and I am already feeling sorry for whatever offspring i will indefinitely produce in this place.
I pray for you bro.
just tried to scoop ice cream with a steak knife. now in the emergency room with a the cab diver and the drag queen he picked up on the way. its gonna be a loooong day.
she keeps a switchblade in her panty drawer... i am both terrified and slightly turned on
If I win the lottery I'm going to hire someone to skywrite "FUCKTARD" over his house. That much anger.
No he reached for my hand at the beach. I pretended to be a seagull.
woke up on my floor using my jeans i wore out as a pillow
haha i wouldn't expect any less of you
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