i think i may have caused an international incident at the french embassy, just fyi
hahaha how?
its a long story involving a horse trailer and some shrubbery
did you know they have Ed Hardy school supplies at Target? it's like folders and notebooks for little douchebags in training.
We had sex on the first date...do you think he thinks I'm a whore?
Yes and so do I
FIrst one done
How did it go?
I dunno I taled about women being treated wrong and quoted Ice T. So probably a "c"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
look mate, i'm pretty sure 14 texts saying "fuck me. fuck me now" more than passes the legal benchmark for consent.
I made a vision board specifically for the purpose of boning john mayer.
I just puked in my fish tank. Helloooooo summer.
drinking out of a sandbucket again
So I found where you barfed in my house. Just wanted to let you know that my cat barfed on the kitchen floor in a show of solidarity
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
she genuinely believed that kangaroos are a cross between a deer and a T-rex
I think the best part was the fact that the stripper's lock screen was a picture of the virgin mary
We got signed out of jail by an Uber driver. I think that qualifies as a great first night of college
I'm trimming my pubes right now and the battery was wearing down. So I chose to only trim one side. I cut the right side down and now I look like pubic two-face. Right all trim and near and left like a caveman.
I'm still not sure how to feel about the fact that we had a threesome with a guy the same age as my dad
Dude, he came to our house with a beer can in his hand dressed up in a chicken suit screaming, "free eggs!" then threw up and passed out in the front yard.
Randomize