I am spending my child support on dildos
its time to go be "that drunk guy nobody knows"....again.
she's into porn, im staying here tonight
She tried to wake me up by touching my dick. I kept pretending to be asleep.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
and then the other night his penis tricked us both into sex
I need to sleep with 3 more guys by midnight to meet my 2010 resolution..
Just got a blowjob in her closet with two people sleeping outside in the room. I feel like the emperor of college.
Do you think i can prewrite an apology on friday and leave it vague enough to just finish on sunday?
Nothing says 'good morning' like waking up only to realize this chick was watching you sleep. She's crazy
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He broke hus nose arm jousting with the traffic cones... We need to make head shots illegal or get helmets or something
you should have seen it. it was just a bunch of guys in togas chanting the username and password to a brazzers account we all share. best thing that has happened to our group
May or may not have been going down the road shooting fireworks.
idk the fact that her roommate had a sign that said "enter without knock, exit without cock" makes me really NOT want to go steal her pot.
He literally knows my vagina better then I do.
You yelled at me about a fork.
You probably deserved it, I'm very territorial about my cutlery.
Randomize