i messed up with two guys last night...one i pranked and left the phone on..the other one i went crazy on trying to be his girlfriend after four jagermeister shots...
singing james blunt while drunk. tell me thats not wonderful
Just shaved my legs with toilet water in a walgreens bathroom. I am so classy.
who do I fuck, the girl waiting for me upstairs or her roomate making me mac and cheese right now?? This is the single hardest decision I've always wanted to have to make
She cried. My mom screams. And nut went everywhere. It was all around a bad situation.
Some kid just walked into class with his schedlue written on a keystone box.
This is me reassuring you that I'm still alive and making sure you still are.
No fireworks. Throwing the old microwave off the deck.
I feel like I need to get a restraining order against him but I'd probably be the one to break it.
We got jeff a deep fryer for his bday. So far the count is two potatoes and your iPod.
At one point last night I over heard you say " I'm gonna puke in a bag and pour it down your throat" I LOVE YOU.
you licked my face then when I finally got you to the bathroom, mid puke you said you liked the taste of my foundation.....you weren't drunk at all....
I don't like how my gyno is telling me how to live my life.
i was asked to be gay of honor by three different girls and NONE of the groomsmen at any of the weddings is open to experimenting. i mean whats the point then.
You wanna know what I want to eat? Questionable Mexican food before I go drink. Makes for excitement. Will I puke it up or shit my pants