I think drunk me is telling hungover me something... I just have to crack the code.
You taught me that having a dip while u shit is awesome. I appreciate u for that
He was completely serious when he said my boobs were like "majestic white clouds."
If I refrain from fucking my manager, I'm going to reward myself by fucking that guy from the photo department.
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don't be alarmed if you come back and i'm passed out drunk and naked cuddling with the franzia.
Edward fifth and chaser hands
You stumbled in at 10am, half-clothed and still drunk from last night and yelled "well, its not called a walk of pride!", then passed out on the couch.
He took a picture with a naked dude. I think he just walked out of that deep ginger closet.
The 12 year old son winked and made eyes at me while his father fed me vodka gummy bears. Gameday yo
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You were so drunk that you didn't even notice when I switched out your shot of jäger for a shot of maple syrup...before or after you drank it.
How much weight does it take to launch a cat using a trebuchet vs the tension required for a catapult?
You know you went through something intense when you actuallu applaud yourself for not shitting your pants
Now I'm having a post-sex brownie. Is this the life? I think it might be
Is it just me or is Michael Jackson blasting throughout the house
Started mixing booze directly into the 2 liters and carrying them around. Mixing less often, and now kind of weightlifting,so double effecient.