absolutely 100% incorrect. and i love you more you silk skinned goddess
is it bad that the economy has gotten so bad that finding cheap gas gives me the same excitement and joy as finding a hot, blonde haired, blue eyed, tall, athletic single straight guy?
I cant wait for the day that I tell my daughter I named her after my favorite porn star.
so let's talk penis.
i lost my airplane ticket and tried to board with a bar receipt in all the confusion. i have officially lost all brain cells in college.
im sober
you just pulled your sweatpants out of your bag and thanked them for being alive
She wants to have naked weekends
They call that free range vagina in France
So apparently the only parts of last night I remember didn't actually happen.. When did vodka become a hallucinogen?
Shit dude that sort of wholesale destruction can't just be done at the drop of a hat
How would your parents feel if we installed a sex swing?
So i stood up out of the sunroof while he gave me oral. Car was still moving. Exactly how illegal is that?
I appreciate your acceptance of my lack of morals
Is there anything more American than getting day drunk and watching Hulk Hogan promos?
My mom and my boss just had a discussion on FB about the sexual habits of old people. The magic of the Internet.
I used to shoot steroids in my ass but for a totally different reason
Randomize
