Texts From Last Night

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  (336): View more from North Carolina

  do you ever think like no deep thought could take place in the spanish language? like all they talk about is like tacos?

  (828): View more from North Carolina

  how high are you?

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  (336): do you ever think like no deep thought could take place in the spanish language? like all they talk about is like tacos? (828): how high are you? http://tfl.nu/9z76
  Replies (59) Good night (12338) Bad night (1690)
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  (914): View more from New York

  im not sure if this headache is from the car accident or cocaine withdrawl

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  (914): im not sure if this headache is from the car accident or cocaine withdrawl http://tfl.nu/i1d7
  Replies (15) Good night (881) Bad night (4989)
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  (630): View more from Illinois

  the realtor just asked me if i've ever made meth on this property.... i need to do something about my hair

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  (630): the realtor just asked me if i've ever made meth on this property.... i need to do something about my hair http://tfl.nu/rgwc
  Replies (17) Good night (1111) Bad night (4465)
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  (720): View more from Colorado

  I do remember getting hit in the face by an ugly one because she thought I was blowing on her butthole.

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  (720): I do remember getting hit in the face by an ugly one because she thought I was blowing on her butthole. http://tfl.nu/jzio
  Replies (11) Good night (846) Bad night (2983)
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  (215): View more from Pennsylvania

  It's great having no responsibilities. In normal life I would be freaking the fuck out right about now. But the only worry I have from last night is where i got this shower caddy full of cookies. God I love college.

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  (215): It's great having no responsibilities. In normal life I would be freaking the fuck out right about now. But the only worry I have from last night is where i got this shower caddy full of cookies. God I love college. http://tfl.nu/yb1z
  Replies (9) Good night (2350) Bad night (606)
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  (619): View more from California

  Just put an ad on Craigslist for a fake groom... I'm sure only non creepy sane people will respond to it

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  (619): Just put an ad on Craigslist for a fake groom... I'm sure only non creepy sane people will respond to it http://tfl.nu/st9u
  Replies (5) Good night (1023) Bad night (460)
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  (479): View more from Arkansas

  It's been a year of occasional hook ups....this was bound to happen sometime even with your jank ovary schedule.

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  (479): It's been a year of occasional hook ups....this was bound to happen sometime even with your jank ovary schedule. http://tfl.nu/n9xy
  Replies (5) Good night (444) Bad night (1198)
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  (509): View more from Washington

  So how was your new years? Did u ride a horse at 3am in zero degree weather? Because I sure did

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  (509): So how was your new years? Did u ride a horse at 3am in zero degree weather? Because I sure did http://tfl.nu/hjy4
  Replies (2) Good night (1291) Bad night (296)
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  (610): View more from Pennsylvania

  How are you not embarrassed to know me. I'm a mess right now. I'm a walking, talking tornado of embarrassment

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  (610): How are you not embarrassed to know me. I'm a mess right now. I'm a walking, talking tornado of embarrassment http://tfl.nu/bnot
  Replies (4) Good night (623) Bad night (305)
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  (312): View more from Illinois

  You can fuck me but I'm keeping my parka on.

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  (312): You can fuck me but I'm keeping my parka on. http://tfl.nu/wd3p
  Replies (5) Good night (1082) Bad night (288)
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  (520): View more from Arizona

  Pretty sure I just became my mom's wingman

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  (520): Pretty sure I just became my mom's wingman http://tfl.nu/fkwg
  Replies (3) Good night (528) Bad night (372)
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  (239): View more from Florida

  Was so drunk I had to masturbate face up cuz I thought I was gonna be suffocated by the pillows.

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  (239): Was so drunk I had to masturbate face up cuz I thought I was gonna be suffocated by the pillows. http://tfl.nu/ni5n
  Replies (7) Good night (491) Bad night (260)
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  (916): View more from California

  Defrosting my uncrustable with my laptop...Hungover dinner

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  (916): Defrosting my uncrustable with my laptop...Hungover dinner http://tfl.nu/9gah
  Replies (1) Good night (456) Bad night (273)
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  (210): View more from Texas

  hey dude my crackhead idol just taught me a great way to tie shoes

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  (210): hey dude my crackhead idol just taught me a great way to tie shoes http://tfl.nu/7n4w
  Replies (3) Good night (306) Bad night (280)
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  (623): View more from Arizona

  It's after midnight. I didn't find the answer to my problem, but I did find the bottom of a bottle of vodka, so... there's that.

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  (623): It's after midnight. I didn't find the answer to my problem, but I did find the bottom of a bottle of vodka, so... there's that. http://tfl.nu/i8dz
  Replies (5) Good night (649) Bad night (201)

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