rainy day on campus = new personal fetish for girls in booty shorts and colorful rain boots
YOU CAN RENT MIDGETS ON CRAIGS LIST
I told you not to ruin your birthday surprise!
we had you propped up in a chair and fed you donuts. i've never seen you happier
he asked me to smell his eyeballs.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Found a dirty envelope on my seat w ur name and $122.50 written on the front. Nothing inside but what looks like dirty pine needles
If you ever find a dick that big chop it off and bring it to me.
Make sure your heart doesn't explode. These are words of wisdom.
I'm okay with corrupting his young mind.
Ew! He's just a child!
AND I'M GONNA SHOW HIM HOW TO MAKE ONE.
Things I learned last night: 1. Bacardi 151 is a one-way ticket to the toilet, 2. It is possible for a human being to turn into Mount Vesuvius
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
6 beers and it feels like I've been drinking water... Daiquiri time
We did it in the bathroom in Taco Bell. We didn't buy anything before we left, which I thought was rude.
Literally just inhaled three cinnamon rolls. Sara is staring. It was inhuman
I have a strong contender for the new number 1 position for fwb. He met me at the door with pizza and a shot of patron
Enjoy the penises
I'm going to get drunk, come back, call my grandma, and eat all those scrambled eggs.
Randomize