That's when you crack a 10am beer
"Tonight I'm turning swine flu into an std" this might be how zombies come about. Peace civilization.
I swear god or herbie drove my car home
he must have thought the song was "ejacuate on the dance floor"
Careful when you walk in I'm laying by the door.
If a man doesnt have the ability to fuck you well on a small climbing wall, I don't think he deserves you.
Now I don't feel so bad about telling everyone that he's 23 and needs Viagra. It's her problem now
Haha, maybe if he wasn't dressed up like Kimmy Gibler he could give her the D
that pic of me and the hulking football player sure does come in handy when creepy guys hit on me at the bar.
you smell like cheap hookers & chicken nuggets.
the cashier at the gas station pulled a twig out of my hair and told me I should probably wash it before work....it was kinda sweet.
She deliberately backed into the homewrecker's whoremobile and yelled ""FOR SPARTA!"
There was one thing about my NYC trip I forgot to tell you: I took a dump in Trump Tower
If you dont get laid dressed as Woody Harrelson in Zombieland, I have lost all faith in the men of nw Indiana.
Rarely does a man I fucked with upgrade from me
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