It's fine actually... I'm pretty sure he had the crookedest weiner in the world anyway.
Like he had it hanging in the wind and you just decided, "nope, I don't think that one's for me." ????
God no! I could just feel it. His clock said it was 8:00 when, clearly, it should have been midnight.
I just had to explain to my father, how having two screens plugged into my computer doesn't use more internet.
he just stuck his car key in my belly button, made car starting noises and pretended like i was revving my engine?
Straightened my pubes. My dick looks like John Lennon fucked Gonzo.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
dude she has hot friends.. do you want blonde brunette or red head.. maybe asian?
what is this build-a-bear? .. just gimme one thats breathing
I have shoes on. No pants. And my jacket pockets are full of ketchup and grass. Yes. Good night.
My vagina just recognized that song.
We hung out in the bathroom the whole time and talked about sex and watched some girl pee. If you don't believe I was there, check the bathtub for bread crust.
I spilt beer on the table, and she quickly got a straw and yelled party foul and made me drink it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
well if they don't get here soon...no fuck it, I'm going to the strip club.
Pornhub is still operational. Therefore, the world has NOT come to an end in the blizzard!
Got robbed by an ATM. My weekend officially sucks.
Today was brought to you by the letter B for beer and bourbon and the number fuck you I'm meant to be studying not hungover
Goddamn it. Hes got me addicted to his penis
Hiding in a kitchen with no pants orange juice abs a pillow...please joun
I haye tequella
Randomize