Sorry, I have to go home and feed my nepotisms
Sorry, I can't talk, there's a herd of nepotisms headed my way
Goal for tonight: Make one last drunken mistake for the semester.
you know it is a bad morning when you forget to brush your teeth and eat old gas x in your car because its minty...
Come downstairs. Moms serving wine for breakfast again.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you should give me head with plastic fangs in
Thank you for calling me on to a higher level of debauchery. fuck anyone who says we aren't good for each other
The cops busted down the door and everyone ran. I was just trying to find my shirt before I got arrested
Oh god. I asked to "play his sexaphone" which I though was a super sex way to say "let me blow you". He fucking walked home at 4:30am
I woke up on a navy base in a different time zone. I'm never leaving tallahassee again.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She has "Massive Shits" listed as a turn off. That's very specific and there's a story behind it I bet.
Sweet, got a date tomorrow night
Sex with him is like pizza, it can be shitty but its stillll pizza.....
I feel like a sex bomb and I need to go explode on somebody
His roommates are gone so we had sex in every room of the house and watched the wire. What have you done today?
Even his sexts are poetic. He said breasts instead of tits so I'm gonna lock this shit down asap
When your job has killed your spirit to the point that you don't want to flirt with the cute, tall guy at Enterprise
GIRL PLEASE. GO BACK AND POP THE TITTY OUT
Randomize