Spring semester is just not the same w/o you
dude. late night with jimmy fallon isnt even funny. the people in the audience there to see him dont even think hes funny.
kinda like you and your friends.
Did you know nanny-cams work just as well for recording that blow job on the sofa?
i just threw up repeatedly on the entire entire walk down A1A to the pizza place....then on the way back slipped and fell in it
This just in: I met a girl who does the phone sex phone lines, and shes' 5'4" 320. I'll never get a hardon again through a phone.
Haha so I huess that means he's a little over 7. I can use my throat as a ruler!!
One less school supply you need to buy!!
I'm eating mac and cheese for dinner that way when I puke later it'll be festive halloween orange.
Your lower body and my face have had way too much contact lately.
Dude, its flawless. what could go wrong?
Jail. That could go wrong.
The bartender said he wanted to turn you gay, and we got free shots the rest of the night
I'm hurting so bad I actially had to wait for my mini wheats to get soggy before I could eat them..
He asked me not to hook up with anyone else because it would hurt his feelings.. while his arm was around his pregnant girlfriend.
There's going to be a velveeta shortage. I'm not drunk any more, this is just dire info.
I woke up at 5am to tell him I wanted to take his dick on la Tour de France, I might need a nap later
Come here I'm naked
And I want mozzarella sticks
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