How can something that makes you feel so good one day make you feel so bad the next?
Alcohol?
Sex with a fat chick.
I didn't have a rubber, but my dick had a date with a clorox wipe after we finished. I think I'm in the clear.
I am definitely the only sober one on this train. And the only one not wearing a business suit. Wow, Monday Korea.
I would rather deep fry my own cock while it's still attached to me than have his life.
we found him passed out on the baseball field with two 40oz and wearing a tophat.
Where did he get the tophat?
All my interactions with my brother are drug deals at this point
If I just skip sleeping, does hangover still happen? Gonna try it. Will report back. StTAND BY
I have no concept of chastity or moderation, she is a Catholic guilt poster child, how could I not try to hit that
he showed me his third nipple on the first date. I might have low to no standards, but my god.
When dealing with embarassing medical issues, don't you want your brother's wife to be the one fishing around up your ass?
So I'm at early voting and the group of ladies behind me is talking about voting no on 2 and my gummy is kicking in, thank lawd
Sooo i'm debating posing nude for the drawing and painting classes, I just wanna see if they draw my nip ring.
but like who hasn’t gotten fingered at the state fair?
Some bitch is passed out in a pool of vomit. Fucking lightweight, it's only 8.30.
Oh, wait.. That's you.
I think its a little fucked up she invited you to her wedding, are you going?
There is a lot of acid in my drugs right now
....ill put you down as a no then
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