i hope S**** or M***** or someone took note of the fact that i was drinking popov like water and could no longer form sentences. i mean, dont get me wrong i had been thinking about boning R*** long before my sobriety left the picture but the number of reasons not to, outweighed the temptation and without sir robert burnett as R***'s wingman, it would have never happened
I was so drunk I accidentally put in two tampons.
I tried to talk you out of it. You were worried about alcohol being a blood thinner.
I'm not really into her personality. Not that we've ever looked for personality in women.
That's only a quality to look for in a second marriage.
Status Uddate: I lost half a tooth and Alison is taking Amy Grant requests via bullhorn
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
some girl at the bar told me my beard would tickle every inch of her body till she joy puked her face off.... that was so random and odd i just had to buy her a drink for having the guts to say it to me. WTF
There are a bunch of highly educated, advanced in their field, PUSSY ASS BITCHES in this bar
also karaoke with swedish 7yr old and drunk 50yr old = best idea ever
Someone drunkenly cleaned and organized my car last night... Nothing's missing, so that's a plus.
I bit my tongue so hard I left a deep imprint. Fuck you tongue, stop getting in the way of food.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I knew things were bad when my gyno recommended meditation.
Sitting topless in my room drinking wine from a box... It's good to be back at school
It's national "dress up your pet day" come over. Drugs and dressed up cats..it's the shit dreams are made of.
I hate how much more visible my vomit is on snow, I need a winter vomit bush
I just spent 5 minutes saying how beautiful you are and you come back with dont get fat cause you have weird nipples.
I can't decide if I miss drinking or you, they are so closely connected.
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