you think thats bad? Today I had to pop a zit on my sack.
I owe all of my success to double stuf oreos and weed.
What's the big deal? you guys fuck
3 times is my limit. I don't even want to know you exist after 3 times
I'm hoping that banging a 24 year old 3 times cancels out banging that freshman on Wednesday
So my OCD kicked in and I cleaned his kitchen. His roommates were so grateful, they tried to pay me in weed.
YOU ACCEPTED, RIGHT?
In lieu of flowers, please donate to The Hungover Children's Fund in my name.
Your CAR. Is in a LAKE. I'd say "a big mess" is a pretty conservative description of the situation.
I had to convince someone last night that the fact that he couldn't get me off wasn't him it was me and to clarify I had to tell him there was only. One person that got me off every time without fail, he said "that guy is my hero" you should be proud
Well at least the house will be decorated when u get evicted.
Woke up in time for my 8:15
Good for you I'm impressed
I realized 10 minutes in it was a class from last semester
Btw. Being a stripper for a week without anyone knowing to pay off my school loan is no longer in my agenda.
My only contacts are booty calls or the club hockey team.
If you come home to me in lingerie and you start vacuuming...I need to reevaluate my priorities
I had sex in the bed of a guy who owns a house last night so I feel like this is a significant step up from car sex in the parking lot of a library
my mom is feeding me weed brownies...god help us
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