She made a guy cry in the bar. I will have her, oh yes, I will have her..
i fell off the bed in the middle of it, and he yelled "5 second rule" and kept fucking me. i think im in love
Just got arrested at PF changs. Happy New year, China
Oh please. You given/recieved a handjob out in public. I think that shy ship has sailed.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
His parents had a bottle of captain morgan on the table for me when I went for dinner. I feel accepted
When I woke up I had three missed calls from the name 'dream krystals'.... If I remember correctly she was the lady at the drive thru at Krystals and her name was Dream.. She wanted to come to the strip club with us... Do you remember?
We're having a serious conversation and I just responded to something he said with an emoticon. I am so baked.
HE'S EATING THE CONFETTI. STOP HIM NOW.
Ok, I have three hours. I'm trying to work out two blow jobs and a taco.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
At this point i guess a traditional, non-life-threatening pity fuck is too much to ask for
I don't know what happened this summer, I've lost my sense of morality. All I do now is work, get drunk, and have sex near national landmarks.
Turns out I tore my ACL when I fell off the mechanical bull.. Happy bday to me
i refuse to take responsibility for eating Chuck E Cheese pizza and having any other repercussions than the shits.
Looking back, we probably shouldn't have chased alcohol with more alcohol
He's the one named Andrew. In his profile picture he is the one on the right in the monkey costume.
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