If that really is brett favre's penis, no wonder she ignored his calls
The ice cream man just told me to use protection.
No just sleep deprived. James woke me up at 7 and forced me to eat a hot pocket with him cause he " didn't want me to die".
It's all coming back to me. I drank moonshine from a milk carton from a guy named tomohawk last night.
i have officially banned the recreational use of bayonets.
People spilled so much that there was a thin film of beer on the floor. You took a running start, screamed, "SLIP AND SLIDE!" and slid face first through the drywall.
Just told my boss I wasn't coming in to work because of a serious case of blue balls. Totally made having them worth it.
I haven't been that free with the boobs since I was 19. I'm putting them away for a while.
If you insist
The one guy literally flopped my boob out. Yes I insist.
No it was fine, I've just never seen that many people eat dog food
I just sneezed glitter I JUST SNEEZED G LITTER I j u st SneeZED GLIT TER I DO NOT HAVE TIME FOR THIS AT ALL.
time to play the game of how much Christmas shopping I can get done before these shrooms kick in
Dropped the bowl in the litter box. But it landed face up. What do I do?
So changing channels while she's on top is frowned upon. It's back to thinking about baseball again.
He just seemed to happy to be having sex with me that it ruined the mood for me. I just wanted to punch him.
If you wear a peguin suit you MUST send me a picture!!!
Randomize
