Right on... I dropped my chapstick
I blacked out
You just kept yelling, "THAT'S THE POWER OF PINESOL, BABY!"
You went around chanting "dinosaur period" and drinking tomato soup from the can.
I definitely hasselhoffed a taco bell burrito on my kitchen floor in front of my dad and little brother.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Peeing off the roof of a motel lighting a cigar with matches and speaking fluent spanish with a chilen exchange student...how do iget into these situations?
I may have just unintentionally roofied a man in a wheelchair
i was really disappointed no one would drink beer from our cleavage last night except for us
Let the vodka take you where it will. Like Pocahontas, but wasted
i told her i wanted to be the Neil Armstrong of her vagina,
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was just doing the math on how much beer we need for the houseboat. in doing so, I came to the conclusion that we need to open a beer distributor business.
I don't trust his life but I trust his penis.
Went up to some dude that hit on Laura and told him he has a voice like a grandma. Apparently didnt have muscles or kindness like grandma so can you pick me up at the ER please?
Everything is bullshit and I hate everyone
My mom just came upstairs handed me an Adderall and asked if I could help her wash the ceilings
He just got back from doing field research studying wild chimpanzees in the goddamn jungle. Obviously I fucked him.
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