all a guy has to do is give me sprinkles and cookies and they can get me in bed
apparently the bartender would rather give me free shots than tell me that my whole nipple piercing was hanging out
I think we should bring back the casual nipple tassel
I know. I told you I'm a mess. She had weird nipples. I almost lost an eye to one.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Eric and I just went in the hallway to practice our new handshake in a real life situation at live speeds. That high.
Like I've never seen her that drunk. She's usually like quiet and doesn't say she'll fuck someone on a futon
I've never heard "I will drown your mother in vanilla pudding" as an insult before, and then last night happened.
We had sex twice and at Wendy's how dare you diminish that.
We're eating jello shots in the library. I love the day after Valentine's
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Somewhere out there, on several phones belonging to strangers, exists a video of me rapping Baby Got Back on stage in four inch heels that I stole from the drag queen. Also I made out with the chick with the octopus tattoo.
You have the best birthdays
I am one with the molecules
I don't know what's wrong with me. The guy from bar rescue is making me horny
Do normal couples celebrate occasions naked with Chicken McNuggets and BBQ sauce?
Went home with a guy last night with Taco Bell sauce in my hair and on my pants
he tried to have the "are we in a relationship" chat last night. I stuck my fingers in my ears, yelled lalalalalala very loudly at him and told him I would stop having sex with him if he ever tried that conversation again. bad person, or just being a realist?
Randomize