I love being friends with rich people. I get laid by association.
My wife all of the sudden got markedly better at giving blow jobs. Should I be happy or concerned?
some girl had on jean underwear. i hate america.
after the first, "yea you like that baby", i quickly remembered why i had stopped having sex with him.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
there's got to be a less slutty way to tell him the baby isn't his
first off, his name is dougie. strike one.
Is waterboarding an exceptable way of getting sober?
Protocol on turning down a date from someone in the House of Representatives?
Ok, I have three hours. I'm trying to work out two blow jobs and a taco.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My crowning drunk achievement from that night was donating $5 to the Obama campaign.
You're perfect
I threw up in the darkest corner of the bar last night, then watched 2 girls freak out in disgust after walking through it. I then realised I puked on the dancefloor, took a picture and proceeded to send it to my mom.
Do you think I'm short enough to dress up in a ghost costume and go trick or treating and have people believe that I'm actually a child?
And thanks to you I'm pretty sure I'm banned from every qdoba in south carolina. And cab company
yea sometimes its awkward. but when you're a straight bartender at a gay bar and everyone knows it, they all think that they can make me turn gay. its like oh yea dude that extra $20 tip makes me want to suck some dick now
At least I know that however bad my life gets and how low I can feel I'll never feel shitting in a red robin parking lot low
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