the young, male pastor of my church has a jesus fish tramp-stamp. I made him show me.
my sex list reads like a who's who of mcdonald's general managers
I told him that all frat guys do it... it was that easy to get him to go down on me.
It's nice to sit in the library and see the progression from freshman pledge to 6th year coke addict all at one table. Gotta love sororities
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Should I feel bad that I fucked her and made her ride my little brothers razor scooter home?
I swear if it wasn't for meeting for drug dealers @ gas stations, i would never remember to get gas.
We've gotten 3 pitchers already by trading for CUPCAKES
Drunk in burger king. Having it our way. Free fries. M&m sundaes.
So good!! I became real good friends with an adorable black lesbian couple from Baltimore and a man in a diaper.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This guy has a theme song for the joints he rolls
I was telling my friend about your penis and the only word I could think of was voluptuous. You have a voluptuous dick.
I left him on his mom's lawn after he passed out in my lap and told me my vagina smells like flowers. Couple of the year award
I wanted to say "you're a souless cunt" but in a nice way. So I added a smiley face.
According to my bank account I spent a penny some where
I’m appalled by how severely I lower my standards when I’m horny & impaired
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