you spent the like half the night trying to figure out the puzzles on the back of the captn crunch box
Five Mah tais Laser and i skill have not drunk dial you
You are the patron saint of my drinking problem.
Dude, we took our shirts off and set our chest hair on fire. That's a low point.
You raise a valid concern
The difference between you and me last night was that I didn't remember getting into the cab and you didnt know we were in one.
He was in Alberta for less than a week and is already banned from 6 bars. I fear for his general well-being over there.
get ready to load up the weird cannon and blow a load of buck-wildness all over the place people
I apparantly wanted to name her baby garbage
Can't wait to bequeath this flannel to my grandchildren someday.
'I've been using this to pick up lesbians since before you were born!'
Saw a girl outside my apartment shotgun a bud light, then a red bull, get in her Tahoe, and drive 4 people away. Gotta love thirsty Thursday.
Just bought a colored water bottle so my classmates can be so judgemental when I bring beer to class.
When did i become the Rickety Cricket of my own life?
Kick open the door, strike a pose, steal a boyfriend, end scene.
Sitting naked in my bed eating leftover Mexican food drinking coors light.. Can it get any more single than this?
Remind me to do laundry tomorrow so i have something decent to take off when i get laid.
Randomize
