I'm starting a business if you want to get involved
oh boy
Its called Cut N Tugs, haircuts with happy endings
Do you ever think that bumblebee is the gay transformer?
Every day of my life.
He jizzed my face. I had to ask for a washcloth. He ran his underwear under the water and handed them to me. Not so romantic.
so, i drunkenly called my religious roomie because i was lost and told her if she couldn't come find me, jesus would condemn her to hell for not leading me to the light .. too much?
We shouldn"t be alone together
you didn"t say that yesterday
you weren't married yesterday
She agreed that we could have sex whenever I wanted and I could let someone else meet my mom.
he got mad becuase i made more noise when he gave me a back massage then i do when we actually have sex
I got turned off after he said, "i can see us in the future...me, you, and a back yard full of alpacas."
I think the saddest part about my sex life is that most of it is pity sex.
i have to vacuum my washing machine now, asshole
I lost the right to judge tonight
Hypothetically speaking, at what point does fire become too much fire?
I HAVENT HAD A NICE A NICE DICK SINCE FEBRUARY!! I WANNA KEEP THIS ONE!!!
I'm going to ride your dick until it falls off. That horny.
I'm equal parts terrified and turned on. Come over.
I don't want to just hook up with random dudes. I've had enough bad sex to know that it's not worth hooking up with strangers
It's not?
Randomize
