Dude, I just had an awesome rave/orgy with like bunch of hot Asian chicks on a cable car. It was like being in a Gwen Stefani video, cept w/o the bad spelling
God, I love San Francisco.
did i really try to jack off an athens police horse last night? please tell me youre kidding..
on the last problem of the exam i just drew a picture of a cat and left
Soo I have a handle of 100 proof captain, cupcakes, and nothing to get up for in the morning.. This blizzard is shaping up to be a great night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
What. The. Fuck. No, you will not spank me.
That wasn't intended for you, my bad.
What? Cold floors are soothing when you have a hangover. How am I supposed to pass that up. Even if I'm at my parents house
Throwing up while listening to pandora radio. Don't tell me my life doesn't have theme music.
It was a two-sided wall so part of my body ended up in someone elses condo.
Also, the drinking age in Japan is 20. At what point in the sky am I allowed to start downing alcohol?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm off the liquor
You're forefathers are ashamed of you. They didn't struggle to make it to America so that you could become a soft dick
I only got lap dances from the ugliest strippers, i couldnt stop myself from laughing the entire time.
My Canadian brought me three bottles of maple syrup, a sunflower, and a pair of Oakleys back to the states...he's either drunk or he loves me
You are the ghost of drunk bitches past, present, and future.
Hungover on St. Patrick's Day. I did this backwards.
Your liver needs more exercise - we start training tonight.
Randomize