therell be strippers and coke right?
no strippers. just coke.
i hate this fuckin recession
There's something fitting about a hot in-car interracial makeout to the tune of 'healing the world.' RIP Mike.
You admitted to me in secrecy that you want to jerk off a unicorn.
Sandwiches are there for you when porn isn't.
These 19 Deaths Are Ironically Hilarious
Places you have drunkenly threatened to piss: my bed, my bros bed, my moms bed, my bros wedding
Thanks for last night. Sorry if i was obnoxious. I respect your morals and i wouldn't want you to lose your virginity to a drunk girl in your mom's prius.
This is part your fault too. Don't tell me your dishes are unbreakable and not expect me to prove you wrong.
I was so stoned on the way to work, I pretended you were in the car with me. We sang "Mrs. Jackson" by outkast.
She just told me her legs are numb and that she dedicated her karaoke of ice ice baby to her 4 month old son.
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Boys DO look like their dicks. Its like dogs.
When I woke up everyone at the party was in their underwear. Only you guys were playing strip pong.
Yes, we all have the power to convince a large amount of people to take their clothes off
I took so my adderall all I can do is lie on my floor and stare too hard at my hedgehog. He has 42 spines in the dark spot on his shoulder btw.
So just what does one wear when attending a sex toy party with ones mother-in-law?
Jeans and a nice top.
If your night didn't end with writing a witness report for the cops at a shwarma place, your night was probably less interesting than mine.
I also need to get my life together but instead I just eat spoonfuls of Nutella. We can't win 'em all