Bitch is talking to much, howd u ever get her 2 shut up?
It's worth it.
How worth it?
Back door worth it
ha- omfg whatt the fuck is wrong w me. Alcohol+third cousins= bad decisions
just found a beer in my hamper. even my laundry is a dirty alcoholic.
after last night, i judge her for not breaking up with me
chastity bono is officially a man...and has a really hot girlfriend...life doesn't make sense
My mom just set up beer pong in the dining room for family game night. and you ask why I'm still living at home.
were drug buddies, doing lines off her ass is just a bonus
But today feels so special with katie getting herpes and me cleaning my room. Good things are happening.
My hope for you over spring break is that you can be some disease free girl's random spring break mistake.
Dude, all I know is that I came out of this thing wearing a snorkel mask and completely covered in glitter and soap.
In the future, could you not call me 'bro' while we're having sex?
I'm the Oprah of jello shots
I'm pretty sure my roommate is moving out because her cat likes me better
Just threw up in the trash can at my desk. I guess "beating the hangover" eventually leads to this.
Oh BTW the next time I see you I don't care where we are your dick will be going into some part of my body.
Randomize
