his penis was crooked so i rode him at an angle. he seemed used to this.
We videoed ourselves having sex... I now know why I close my eyes during sex
i couldnt tell she was wearing a bumpit until she started giving me head
He just compared himself to a majestic butterfly in regards to the lack of girlfriends. i don't even know what to say.
I think ill wear my dads dashiki but make it sluttier. We shall see
Seriously! We need to take her a thank you note or something. She puts up with the drugs and the extremely loud sex. She deserves a thank you card.
No she left bc the of pic I have of my mom in my bathroom. She thought it was my gf
Why the hell do you have a picture of YOUR MOM in your bathroom?!?!
It's not socially acceptable to be drunk in adult world. That fact makes me die a little inside.
I just used "et al" in a sext. I thought you'd be proud
Is it OK to disqualify a potential therapist if she lists 50 Shades of Gray as her favorite book? Or is that a good thing?
She had never heard the term "grundle" before. Classiest girl I've met in months
can you please not set my house on fire for once???
still can't believe dude took a personal call while he was balls deep in my mouth.
And somehow i feel like your expectations will turn out to be illegal in some way.
Please stop telling my mom she doesn't have nipples when she's been drinking. You know shell show you. Forcefully.
Randomize
