omg! a creepy truck driver just made a frog puppet wave at me!!!
Admittedly I was a little ambitious with some of the positions but you walked in during the worst of it.
My Yahoo Answers account was suspended. Apparently I answered "I like chicks who do anal" to over 100 questions last night.
i woke up with a wedding ring drawn on my finger...if this was vegas id be worried
I could end up kidnapped. Or worse, the night will be really awkward.
Look you found him on craigslist. You should be happy that he at least HAS a normal looking dick.
You have permanently scared my back with your nails. I would like to congratulate you on a job well done.
There was a guy on the elevator dressed as santa in flip-flops giving away beer.
There is a large, jolly black gentleman in the parking lot of my appartment complex yelling about 5am jelly doughnuts. I want to be where he's at.
Seriously, I am going to crawl in a hole, sew my vagina shut, and spit acid on any man that comes near me.
It's whatever. I just want to see his dick again
He compared my ass to "a 13 year old track star's ass." Umm WTF? Is that supposed to be a compliment? And when I questioned boy or girl he said "either."
My farts smell like burning tires and false courage
Sometimes being bisexual is a curse. Turns out I banged both of her older twin brothers last summer.
You abruptly started screaming because they had and I quote “calamari on the hoof”
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