I met a girl last nite that charged by the inch. i didnt have enough money but i figured shed be a good deal for u
Jerry, you need to find god
this dieting is killing me...just started drooling watching a dog food commercial
So I put about 15 worms in the cuervo bottle. I don't think that's how it works but I feel like hallucinating by 11am
How do you say "I'm not pregnant in Spanish?"
6 other girls and I took an ice cream truck to the bar when we couldn't get a cab. Best birthday ever.
Strip beer pong in the front yard? Of course the cops showed up
what do i owe you?
$237.46 to be exact.
if im having that much fun on the weekend i better start remembering it.
My only expectation is honesty. And three orgasms every time.
Thanks for bailing me out last night guys. it's bullshit that everbeering people at bars is illegal. bitches have no sense of adventure anymore
I made him dress me after we fucked. He put me in TMNT pants and then told me I looked hot.
I don't care how hot he is. I will not strip for him to country music.
Id like to submit an apology whenever you feel like talking.
Its not gonna be for awhile Im not a very forgiving person especially since you TOTALED MY FUCKING CAR.
the cuervo was good, but I started with jello shots. and when i threw up a whole jello shot came out.
i think if a sober person was watching us they would have not thought we were witty
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