I think she kind of thinks she's better than us now ... please. I go to Michigan.
Why is there a case of Coors Light with my address on it?
I feel like I should I write an apology note to the frat for falling down stairs, passing out on the couch, and chugging the entire bottle of burnetts at semiforml last weekend. Apparently I was the main topic of discussion at their chapter meeting last night.
obviously my correlation between being a pro surfer and being extremely good in bed was 100% wrong.
I'm going to make him fall in love with me one blow job at a time.
who put toothpaste on EVERY doorknob in my house?!
Don't do anything you wouldn't want to explain to paramedics
But that's half the fun of it
Due to certain anatomical proportions it was less like fucking and more like childbirth.
'twas the night before moms weekend and all were blacked out. Not a coug was sober not even farm house. I was down to fuck but you were not in sight, so I bid pullmania a sweet goodnight.
A dude I dated in high school just put a status about National Coming Out day. I checked his relationship status. He is dating a dude. Hello, Friday.
I just had to explain to a 5 year old why I had fuzzy handcuffs hidden in a macaroni box under my bed.
How the fuck do you get a noise complaint filed against you at 9:30am on a fucking Tuesday?
so evidently blowing a guy does not mean he will say hi to you when he sees you in class.. in case you're ever wondering
I woke up this morning to find myself laying in a beer puddle with "I'm sorry" written on the shaft of my dick and Nicole was nowhere to be found. Gotta love her
how did i manage to wake up with my bra on backwards?
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