Yah man, that place is surreal
Man, I'm from Tennessee. What the fuck is surreal?
Just got booted from water taxi for showing my balls to a security guard.
make sure i look cute passed out on the couch.
We didn't need to cut her off. I'm pretty sure the lit candle she almost drank would have done it for us
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If I don't come back from Italy with aids I did somethign wrong
Umm, ya, half our class is sitting in starbucks passing around flasks. Yes, flasks. Plural. Going to join them, we're all giving oral presentations in 20. Go hard or go home.
If we both finish he brings me a beer and cookies, if only he finishes I get wine and cheesecake. I think I'm in love.
we're going to the olympic park to run the 100m yeaaaahhh
it's 3am. Nothing could possibly go wrong here.
Today's weekday brunch started at 2pm, and consisted of $7 of sandwich and $50 of cocktails. Also, I hustled the bartender for about $3 playing nickel poker, but he may have been letting me win. Either way, he didn't get into my pants.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You know you are 86'd from the legacy right? You can't down shots then spike the shot glass
Today I'm playing this game called how physically long can I Lay in this one spot before moving, do you have an estimated time of departure?
She just texted me apologizing for taking selfies on my phone then asked me to send them to her
Se wrote an essay in class about proper and fashionable winter wear for dogs. Of course I regret fucking her.
The selfie stick gets 5 stars bc it really added a fun element to my sex tape
Turns out he's actually a she. Might keep dating her just to see Mom's reaction.
Randomize