Did u get laid? I went and bought lube and fleshlighted it while moaning ur name the whole time.
somebody snuck up and got me drunk
Porn is love you can see.
dinner at cheesecake factory: $40. drinks at yard house: $50. having sex in the VG parking lot while people are staring at you awkwardly: priceless. Goodnight.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just had sex in the back of an ambulance. Call me.
Horny girl and non horny girl have different views on life
My complete lack of self respect has really improved my blow job technique
I would seriously fuck her so hard, her contacts would pop out of her eyes.
WHO JUST REMOVED THAT SAME BOARD IN TWO MINUTES FLAT WITH NO INJURIES, SHOES, SOCKS, OR BRA?! THIS BITCH. CRACKIN A BEER FOR DA SHOWA. BITCHES AIN'T SHIT MOTHAFUCKA
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Once again being low on toilet paper is forcing us into another round of our favorite game - toilet paper roulette - where there can only be 1 winner. Maybe.
You ran out of his house yelling "I got the goods!" Then you pulled toilet paper rolls out from under your shirt.
He made a deal with his real estate agent called fucking in 50 properties for sale
Donald Trump looks like someone photoshopped hair onto a dick pic.
Giant stained glass jesus is judging my black pleather pants
Just a little drinking. So much fun and love. The world is a shiny wonderful sphere in the sky so why shouldn't we celebrate?
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