I've come to the conclusion that as a grad student I would much rather prefer to get laid then get drunk
I think you know full well that a few years ago my stance was the polar opposite
I dont know why I dont listen to you more often. He wont stop texting me. And his signature is "dancing with no panties on"
Gordon Ramsey's restaurant in NY is $150 each for the chef's menu
So you're taking me there this weekend?
oh, looks like he just opened a new restaurant right by us- it's called "McDonald's". Must be scottish food.
maybe tonight we can turn coloring into a drinking game
Her vagina smelled like bad decisions
I got 70 on my final, or put differently, I got a "still graduating" on my final.
Motor boating, judging by the amount of lipstick I found I would say between 6 to 8 times
The gyno asked how many partners i've had... I said ummmm she goes ok then i'll just put down ten.
I don't think I have ever puked up that much free breakfast in my life...thank god for Nickle Beers.
What's bad is when she said "what hobo did you steal this dick from?"
Also, we accidentally donated a bong to goodwill
in line at jewel. the cashier is puking in a garbage can while ringing up customers. glad to know im not the only one that 2012 is kicking in the face already.
you were like "guys ... i think i got fingered while dancing tonight"
our poor poor cab driver
Come to my pity party. It's being hosted in my basement. The theme is ambiguously sexual cuddling and wine.
i woke up and couldnt remember who was in my bed and it was so dark.. i rolled over and started kissing him and feeling his face because hey... if the blind can see like that.. maybe i could too
Randomize
