so apparently the car got towed with me passed out in the back seat.
It was a karaoke bar combined with a liquor store and had a donkey pen in the back.
Keeping it classy as usual I see
exactly. I want him to have to live with the fact that he fucked me. I want him to look me in the eye and say "you were a drunken mistake".
The last thing I remember was paying off her younger brother not to judge me, then puking on his shoes.
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The bouncer was just about to kick Sarah out for getting with this guy 'too physically'. I told him that was 'her style' and he let them stay. Banter.
I'm really sorry that I blew your friend in your bed, but to be fair he started it.
Drugs are gluten free tho, right?
in honor of breaking bad starting soon, i am now banging a walter white lookalike. viva heisenberg!
You're 34. You can't make guys wait till the third date anymore. Step it up!
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I grinded with the guy who brought the scooter, I'm leaving with success
Our drunk hook up was interrupted by the delivery guy. When he came back to my room we ate the gyros and went back to sex like we didn't take a lunch break.
I'm jealous, curious, and aroused. All at the same time.
My job here is done.
My friends got engaged today and I learned the techniques of going upside down on a stripper pole. I'm not really sure who won...
So my balls are accidently making an appearance on snapchat
You told your boyfriend he needed to fuck you in the tree because it would make you guys one with nature.
Did he?
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