Who keeps a bong in their car??
Kids who graduated high school two weeks ago.
Remind me to tell you the Scottish bar story tomorrow
Remind me to tell you it was a shitty story when you're done telling it tomorrow
I think you're the first person to ever call Louisville, KY a "romantic getaway".
Was the mom I hooked up with decently attractive I feel like her two friends were hotter
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
And then he proceeded to take my heartbeat, because apparently that tells him whether I was faking or not...
i dont care. it has been a 14 hour day, and we are all celebrating by alternating shots and grilled cheese.
People said that when they tried to talk to me I answered that there was a glass around my head stopping me from answering them
You should be proud. How many people can say they GAVE a stripper an std?
It's great when the cashier at the liquor store asks "weren't you wearing those clothes yesterday"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
seriously they are like going to hulk burst through. There are perks and downfalls to having big boobs
Just want to let you know thanks for setting the bar pretty low when it comes to girls.
"I made out with someone too, but then he tried to fuck and I played dead"
I just puked in my courtyard and dripped toothpaste in my chest hair. You better be getting laid or this drunk is wasted.
lmao he sent me a snapped but i'm afraid to open.
i think i have dick pic PTSD.
My manager is trying to help me find a good career path, and I'm trying to find a professional way to tell him I just wanna smoke and fuck.
Randomize