so explain again why im purple
no
Courtney? Is that you? I have pictures of this very same night.
I'm not really that drunk, but I think vampires should glow in the dark because otherwise it's just unfair
Found more tequila
i guess its officially winter break. i woke up alone and fully clothed this morning.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My dad just knocked on my door and told me that my vibrator was too loud
if he only knew that in between each sext i was puking.
Even his old football coach jokes about how big it is. I don't want to be alone in a room with him and that monster.
there's nothing like the elf drinking game to get me in the christmas spirit.
Oh no I would never do that to her. But when you're single again let me know. Cheating penis is definitely better than single penis. But she has claws.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
direct quote from andrew "you know i can't hear when i drink whiskey"
I'm not sorry for loving America more than everyone else
Doing a walk of shame at Wal-Mart at 3:30am because when I left at 11pm I was getting milk
dude wtf why are there forks in my wall
does "I AM MAGNETOOOO" ring any bells, because that was you for an entire hour last night
There's a hole in our hallway wall. Don't hate me. I'll fix it. It's only about the size of a beach ball. I promise to never scale walls in our apartment ever again. Don't hate me. I love you.
I seriously just had to blow dry my thong.
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