He proposed that we "bone". I've completely given up on boys.
I was talking to this girl who was in love with the air force. I was doing decently until I mentioned that the navy actually has more planes. Cockblocked by my knowledge of random trivia again.
After she came with my hands around her neck, she sat there for a minute and gave me the scuba diving sign for a-ok.
he tried to make a toast, but hit the moving ceiling fan with his beer instead
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bro im too drunk for your spanish code words. did you fuck her or not.
I've been practicing for you. Including stockpiling medical supplies for curing hangovers.
Why the fuck is the royal wedding at 4am. That is obviously not the most appropriate time to drink during finals. It's like I'm bound to fail, by royal decree.
I'm pregaming for my hair cut. Working two jobs definately taught me how to use my time wisely...
Are we hungover?
I got a lapdance from a gay guy in red uggs and spandex shorts with reindeer antlers on. And I don't remember it. Hungover does not even cover it.
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He brought wine and beer. I'll put my pants on for wine and beer.
you start one little fire by the lake and the police want to talk to you all night...
Lol I think I might have been a little aggressive last night there is a blue ass print from your jeans on my wall
Meh, all I have to do tomorrow is proctor an AP test. No loud noises and no physical activity allowed for almost 4 hours. Sounds like the perfect recovery period for a hangover.
The kitchen also doubles as a screaming room after midnight as long as you have something to muffle the sound
Just sold our expired ticket for a free night of bowling to a drunk guy downtown for 50 bucks. Ill buy beer on my way home